How to Deal With Your Child’s Divorce
As a parent, you want the best for your children. You hope they will get a good education and grow up to be stable, loving adults. You may be excited for them to get married and have children someday.
However, marriages don’t always last forever. Your adult child may get his or her heart broken after several years of marriage and file for divorce.
This can be devastating. You may even feel like you’re the one going through the divorce. You may have been close with your child’s spouse. There may be children involved. How will you cope?
Since the breakup affects you as well, should you help you and be supportive? Or should you butt out and have your child fend for themselves so you can avoid taking sides? Here are some do’s and don’ts for parents of divorcing spouses.
Don’t Blame
There are two sides to every story. No matter who did what, you should try to stay neutral and avoid assigning blame. Just because a marriage ended doesn’t mean your child or their spouse is a bad person. Sometimes people just aren’t meant to be with each other. Your child will likely find someone else who is a better match.
Be Prepared to Grieve
If you were especially close with your child’s spouse, you may be grieving the end of the relationship. You will be in denial, then you will feel angry. You may also feel depressed before you learn to accept the situation. You can still stay friends with the ex-spouse, but be sure to ask your child if that’s OK. It may make the situation awkward in the future, especially if there are no grandchildren involved.
Help Your Child Adjust
It’s hard enough to parent when both parents are involved. Being a single parent can be a huge challenge. Be there to help out when needed. For example, you can take your children to sports practice and other activities. You can help babysit so your child can work. You may even need to provide a place for them to stay.
Don’t Be Too Involved
Divorce is a private matter, so butt out unless your child asks for your help or advice. Don’t expect to come to meetings with lawyers or help with the divorce. This is between your child and his or her spouse.
Be Careful With Money
If you give your child money, be clear about the terms and conditions. Is it a loan or a gift? If it’s a loan, make sure it is paid back. If it’s a gift, you may need to offer other children the same amount to avoid resentment.
Seek Legal Help
A divorce is an emotional process that affects many people, including friends and family members. Many people want to support their divorcing loved ones, but aren’t sure what to do and what not to do.
Guide your loved one to seek the right legal help. Fort Lauderdale divorce attorney Edward J. Jennings, P.A. is experienced in dealing with multiple facets of divorce. He can help you and your family move on. Schedule a consultation by calling 954-764-4330 or filling out the online form.
Resource:
chicagotribune.com/lifestyles/sc-divorce-losing-in-law-family-0216-20160212-story.html
https://www.ejj-law.com/online-divorce-mediation-what-to-consider/