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Managing Expectations in a Relationship

DivorceHeartRings

When it comes to expectations in a relationship, we all have them. Some have more expectations than others. It’s fine to be picky when it comes to relationships, but you need to be honest with yourself as well as your partner.

Unrealistic expectations can make it hard to keep a partner. After all, nobody’s perfect, so if you’re having a hard time staying in a relationship, maybe you need to lower your expectations.

Your expectations should be made known to your spouse. What do you expect from them? You need to let them know even if this conversation can be intimidating.

That’s a big problem in relationships. People do not talk much with each other about what they want. Having a conversation about expectations may make you seem high maintenance, but it’s not. We all have different expectations of others, so you shouldn’t assume. A lack of awareness about expectations can lead to disappointment and resentment.

We all have different attitudes toward topics such as household chores, meals, parenting, money, and even sex. Here’s how to discuss them with your partner.

Areas of Expectations

We all have expectations for the following topics, even if we don’t always talk about them:

  • Talking about sex can be embarrassing, but it needs to be done. You should discuss expectations around frequency of sex, satisfaction, likes and dislikes, and sexual desires in a shame-free manner.
  • Money is a hot topic that often leads to divorce. It needs to be discussed or else couples can find themselves in conflict. Do you have debt? What about a joint account? How is money managed and handled? Who should make financial decisions?
  • You may want children together, but how will you parent them? What values, rules, and goals do you have for your family? Be specific about the things that are important to you.

 Managing Expectations

When managing expectations, the best thing you can do is be clear. Tell your partner exactly what you need and make sure you understand what they need.

Also, look beyond expectations and assess the broader context. You or your partner could be experiencing pressure at work, from family, or financially that is affecting behavior.

Managing expectations relates to power and control in the relationship. Deciding how decisions will be made is essential for a healthy relationship.  If you and your spouse have wildly different expectations of each other, it may be time to seek therapy and see if that will help before filing for divorce.

Seek Legal Help

Managing expectations can be done with honest communication. Discussing hard topics with your spouse early on can prevent conflict down the line.

When you can’t manage expectations, resentment and bitterness is bound to build up. When this happens, Fort Lauderdale divorce lawyer Edward J. Jennings, P.A. will be there to help you end your marriage with ease. Call 954-764-4330 or fill out the online form to schedule a consultation today.

Source:

psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mental-and-sexual-health/202407/managing-your-relationship-expectations

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